Many years ago my now deceased dad left me a note. I don’t remember when or where or why but it resides in my desk drawer and I look at it multiple times a day.
For the vast majority of my days on this earth as an adult I did my best to “Give God Everything. . . always,” as he admonished in his note.
My failures loom large in my life at times. There are moments when I least expect it that they sweep over me like a wave of cold water. The fact is, I failed, but I would like to go on living. I have been sorry and will probably die with a sorrow in my heart that may never go away. . . but I still want to go on living and to be faithful to God.
And so I look at this note . . . I think about years of faithfulness and pushing others to be faithful as well. I acknowledge my sin and imperfection and at the same time I work hard to accept the forgiveness of Jesus Christ.
“Give God Everything . . . always.” Okay I will. I will give Him the broken pieces and watch Him work to make something beautiful. God loves you more then you could possibly know unless you have ever needed Him to pick you up from a fall. Then you know. You know a God unknown by those who talk about him the most.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall and H. D. had a great fall . . .and while all the Kings horses and men couldn’t put him together again . . . God can.
In David’s classic Psalm of repentance the words are interpreted this way in The Message:
Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean, scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life. Tune me in to foot-tapping songs, set these once-broken bones to dancing. Don’t look too close for blemishes, give me a clean bill of health. God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life. Don’t throw me out with the trash, or fail to breathe holiness in me. Bring me back from gray exile, put a fresh wind in my sails! Give me a job teaching rebels your ways so the lost can find their way home. Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God, and I’ll sing anthems to your life-giving ways. Unbutton my lips, dear God; I’ll let loose with your praise. Psalm 51:7-15
So I will give God everything — always. Even from the other side of grace.
From the other side of grace 
Whenever I hear the word “failure”… I often wonder who gets to decide what failure is. I failed a calculus class in high school one semester. Did that failure make me a “failure” Or was that class failure a small step in the learning process of a means to an end. Growing up in the conservative holiness environment… from my earliest memories, we were told weekly that we were failures. Growing up in the 60’ & 70’s and experiencing the reforms of our society during that time was diametric to the conservative holiness ilk that ran counter culture to almost everything that was happening in society. The way you dressed, wore your hair, music you listened to, friends you hung out with, were all suspect. Weekly, the preacher would rail against everything that I experienced daily just by going to school. Then, if someone thought you had done something wrong …or “failed” they would sing 30 verses of Just As I Am and come and tug on your sleeve until you went forward and got “saved” again. It seemed to be more about judgement than grace.
Failure… I likely fail at something every day. I will likely let someone down today. I will certainly not meet the expectation of the conservative holiness crowd. But for some reason… I don’t feel like a failure. Instead, I sense the warm embrace of “Grace”… as God walks my journey with me carefully guiding my steps and whispering direction in that still small voice. Thanks for opening my can of worms…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Profound thoughts. His grace IS amazing.
LikeLike
“With man these things are impossible but with God all things are possible”.
In this time of Lent I am reminded that Christ looked down from the cross and prayed for us. “Father forgive…they know not what they do.” In relation to the sins of men, we know that if Christ can forgive the sins of the very ones that were murdering him upon the cross there is nothing you…or I…have ever done that he cannot forgive us of. I still know and believe that the grace and forgiveness of Christ can go far deeper than the stain of sin has ever gone.
Grace and peace Wes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wonderful post my friend! You have and continue to have impact on my thinking and my journey. Press on….
LikeLiked by 1 person